For Her
On September 7th, my life changed forever.
At 9:32 PM, a tiny human emerged into this world to whom I am now entrusted. Not only am I asked to ensure this tiny human's health and safety, but I am also asked to mold her mind into becoming a smart, fierce, independent woman. As a biracial child of an immigrant, she will have to navigate a world currently governed by those who would like to erase her existence. In school, her peers will force her to claim a single identity that will define her social standing. As she matures, she will likely have to endure a whole slew of men who feel entitled to force themselves on her without her consent. Behind the wheel of a vehicle, her very appearance will dictate how local law enforcement interacts with her. In college, she may find those of similar backgrounds, but she will still have those who want to diminish her and her accomplishments. And in the workforce, there will forever be those who see her as a "DEI hire" and nothing more.
My role in her life is simple: to support her, to advocate for her, and to love the person she is and the person she will become. As a White father to a biracial daughter, I will never have her lived experience. She will be called names that I'll never be called. She'll have interactions with law enforcement that I've only heard about on the news. But I will be there for her. To have "the talk" with her about the added risks that permeate her life as a woman of color. To have her vent about the mediocre White man who gets promoted over her. To hear her thoughts on marriage and child-rearing, and what it means for her own children to come from a mixed-race background. The conversations will be hard. I won't have all the answers. I can only promise to be there for her whenever she needs.
In my own life, my work now holds an added significance. The theoretical conversations I've been having have now become grounded in reality. In community organizing, we use our personal stories to identify shared values. As a parent, I now have a story that includes everything I've mentioned. When we discuss our current campaign to lift the statewide ban on rent control, I can share the impact it has on my daughter's upbringing and her desire to ensure that her friends can stay in the neighborhood. My own lived experience now carries added weight when I provide testimony. When I begin my speech with "As a constituent and parent," I now have an added layer of authority that previously didn't exist. Legislators are always talking about their family-first policies, and for the first time, I have a chance to challenge those polices as someone who is now directly impacted by their decisions. It sends the legislators a message that I am advocating for myself as well as those who come after me.
It's the coming after me part that brings this all home. Because while I've always done the work for the next generation, for the very first time, this next generation includes one of my own. Policies we work on today will affect her life down the road. Healthcare. Gun violence prevention. Climate change. As parents, we all want what's best for our children. As politically active parents, we see a political party in power that is doing everything in its power to make life worse for the next generation. And it pisses us off knowing that the GOP is making conscious decisions to take away rights for women and people of color in this country. They want to bring us back a generation. Meanwhile, the rest of us want to see continued progress so that we can fulfill the dream of our children's generation having more opportunities than we ever had.
This is my new mission. To be a husband and a father. To continue the work in my field to help our most vulnerable residents. To support LL and you call in this beloved community. And to raise a daughter who is passionate and political and who understands how and why we got to where we are and what needs to be done to undo all the damage. On September 7, 2043, there will be a newly registered voter in our household who will become a lifelong Democrat. She'll know the party's history, and she'll know what they stand for. She will have instilled in her from an early age the importance of voting and will vote in all local elections. And she will always make sure that her vote and her voice are never silenced by a Republican Party that continues to try to erase her and her existence.
No matter how hard they try.