Weekend self-care open thread: Letting go

Happy weekend, Barflies.

As you know, I and my brothers are awaiting our mother passing over the bridge to that place from where no one returns.

The death of a loved one is one of the constants of being human. We are mortals, and we lose those we love.

What do you do? Do you cling on? Or do you let go?

Letting go doesn't indicate that you don't or didn't love them. Letting go—when someone dies, when a relationship ends—is what you have to do so that you can continue with your life. It says nothing about your feelings for that person. But it lets you live.

Clinging to the past doesn't allow you to live a fully human life. You're partly in the shadows, hanging on to a ghost. They're gone, but you're still here. And they would want you to live.

My mother knew this. My father died the day after my eighteenth birthday. She mourned. She held him in her heart. But she didn't don black for the rest of her life. She lived a full and rich life until dementia took her. And when we finally lose her, I and my brothers will do the same.

If you're holding onto pain, let it go. Release it. Learn from it, but don't let it be the center of your life. You honor those you've lost by living the life they would have wanted you to live.

As always, dear friends, be ever kind to yourselves and those around you. And breathe.