A few words on empathy

Over the past few days, as the media has been transfixed with the story of the shoddily-built Titan, I've seen many things from those on "our side". 

I've seen glee that "rich people" were getting the comeuppance they deserved.

I've seen satisfaction that "billionaires" were suffering an awful death.

I've seen, as I posted on Counter Social, that yes, our shit does stink.

I've also seen variations on the theme that migrants capsizing doesn't merit the same coverage as a group of "explorers" foolishly taking their lives into danger.

I've written about empathy on this blog before. And usually, if not every time, it's been about the lack of empathy visible among those whom we count as our opponents. Those posts have been easy to write. I was writing from a place of righteous certainty. We would never act like that!

But what these past few days have shown me is what I first learned about racism from "our side". What I saw as leftists used racist tropes against Barack Obama. In Bill Maher's odious formulation: "I voted for the Black guy and got the white guy."

Just as racism is present on "our side", so is a lack of empathy.

Empathy isn't something someone merits. Empathy isn't a prize to be given to those who "deserve" it. Empathy is, for me, something which everyone deserves. (More on that later.)

These are the people who were on that ill-begotten voyage:

Those aboard the submersible were British adventurer Hamish Harding, 58; French veteran Titanic explorer Paul Henri Nargeoloet, 77; British-Pakistani businessman Shahzada Dawood, 48, and his 19-year-old son Suleman; and 61-year-old American Stockton Rush, co-founder of OceanGate, the company that operated the lost sub.

Now. To my eye, the only "billionaire" on that submersible was Mr. Dawood. I know nothing of him to merit calling him deserving of his fate. And I certainly know of nothing that his 19-year-old son did to deserve such an awful death. Mr. Harding and Mr. Nargeoloet weren't billionaires. And as far as Mr. Rush? Well, he paid with his life for his sin of building this death trap.

We love to paint ourselves as pure and above reproach. But what I've learned in my almost fifty-four years on this rock is this: None of us are pure. At best, we work constantly to make our worst selves better. And that's not nothing, because we are all subject to bad impulses. We are all subject to prejudices and snap judgments. And in a world where the rich get benefits most of their fellow humans don't, we revel in their getting cut down to size. 

The only "vile" rich person on that submersible was Mr. Dawood. This is what I found out about him:

Pakistani businessman Shahzada Dawood and his son Suleman Dawood were both aboard the submersible, their family and King Charles' Prince’s Trust International confirmed to PEOPLE on June 20.

Shahzada was a trustee at the SETI Institute, a non-profit research organization on life and intelligence in the universe. Per his bio on the website, he “has an M.Sc. in Global Textile Marketing from Philadelphia University, USA, and an LLB from Buckingham University, UK.” The website also states that Shahzada, a British citizen, lived "in the UK with his wife, Christine, his children Sulaiman and Alina” as well as their dog and cat.

He also worked with the Prince’s Trust International and The British Asian Trust, set up by King Charles.

Seems like he was not an "evil billionaire". But, of course, that didn't matter. He was rich, and he must be dehumanized. But the dehumanization extended to all others on that ship. They were all "billionaires", who deserved their fate. When, in fact, they weren't. Mr. Rush, founder of OceanGate, may have been the only one who deserved what occurred. And those in his company who didn't go down will reap the whirlwind they sowed. But how easily so many of us fell into that trope that their deaths were warranted, for "crimes" they committed.

I'm not perfect. I'm not preaching. I, on Counter Social, made jokes at first. But, what I always try to do is to take in new information as it's presented. And I correct myself based on this new information. I'm a librarian. Empathy for others is an occupational necessity. And this empathy shouldn't be limited to those who are righteous, according to my preconceptions. 

Now, a word on this: Empathy is, for me, something which everyone deserves. I should qualify that. Monsters deserve no empathy. Not Donald Trump. Not Vladimir Putin. Not Elon Musk. Not others of their like. They, by their own actions, have removed themselves from a human community. They seek to destroy our common human home. They deserve nothing but punishment. But they are the exceptions. They are the ones who are beyond human redemption. But what I've seen is the rush to put those on the Titan in the realm of monsters. Were they foolish? Yes. But as Stonekettle said, foolishness is not limited to the rich. And, again, Mr. Dawood was the only "evil" billionaire on the Titan. Did his son deserve his fate? Did the two men who lived for adventure and discovery?

OceanGate will get what it deserves. Hopefully, that involves lengthy prison sentences for the surviving principals. But I'm not going to dance on the watery graves of the dead. Not for them, but for myself. Because I have to look at myself in the mirror.

Anyway, as our friend Beau of the Fifth Column says, it's just a thought. Hopefully, I've been able to give everyone who reads this something to think about.