Weekend self-care open thread: I hope you dance

So. I was trying to use my SiriusXM app on my new car, and noticed that it wasn't working. The other night I went rummaging, and saw that my account had somehow terminated. Not sure what that was about, since, well, I could log into my account and see that it was up and running. Nevermind. I fixed it, and started adding stations to my favorites.

One of the channels I came across was love songs from the 90s and Aughts. Oh my God. Yes, I was rather high. But that's of no matter. The first ten songs were all songs I loved back in the day. And it reminded me of earlier times. When I loved freely and unabashedly, without reservation. Often to my detriment. But never regretted.

And then this song came on.

I don't know why. I can't explain it. I hadn't thought of this song since it came out. But, my God. It hit me.

At first, I related it to my wife. But then I realized, no, it wasn't about my wife. Because she's with me. She's not gone. This song is about former loves. Loves for whom I'd held bitter feelings. And in that moment, in the four minutes of that song, I released all those feelings of bitterness. I hoped they danced. I hope they had lives of richness and fulfillment. Because I found that fulfillment.

The song for my wife? This one.

Let me be completely honest. I was an asshole. I was a typical man. I was only concerned with my "freedom". The fact that Teresa didn't leave me after a couple of years is testament to her, not to anything I did. I would have left me. But despite all my bullshit, she stuck with me. And, slowly, I realized that I was not, in fact, giving up any so-called "freedom". That wasn't freedom; it was rank selfishness, the idea that only I mattered, that only my needs and feelings mattered. That, my friends, is a short road to a life of loneliness. It's what is at the root of the so-called "male loneliness epidemic". It is an epidemic of their own creation. Rather than being full, available human beings, they stew in resentment that women don't accept them as they are. And what they are is people unfit for partnership.

My friends, the times are dark. And all that will get us through this is love. It is community. It is selflessness. Without these things, we shall surely perish.

Anyway. On to the music!

Share your faves in the comments.

As always, dear friends, be ever kind, gentle, and joyful to yourselves and those around you. And, my friends: Dance.